Facebook

Well, I guess I have a Facebook now. Anthony was telling me about it at school today, so I thought "Why not?" and made one. As you can see, I chose the cover of Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band as my image thing, 'cus I really hate pictures of my self.
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I really hate them.

Well, I've been thinking about my favorite songs (and rags) lately, so decided to compile a list. All of these are pretty famous, the most obscure is probably Peacherine Rag, but whatever. I sorted the list by artist, from those with the most songs on the list to the least, which means the songs that are the only ones by the artist that played them are in no particular order. The Beatles came out on top, with 5 songs, Scott Joplin close behind with 4 rags, then David Bowie and Michael Jackson. I will very likely be changing this list over the next few days (there are 23 songs atm).
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Hey Jude - The Beatles
Yesterday - The Beatles
Let it Be - The Beatles
Here Comes the Sun - The Beatles
Hello Goodbye - The Beatles
Maple Leaf Rag - Scott Joplin
Easy Winners - Scott Joplin
Peacherine Rag - Scott Joplin
Weeping Willow Rag - Scott Jopin
Ziggy Stardust - David Bowie
Starman - David Bowie
Thriller - Michael Jackson
Beat It - Michael Jackson
American Pie - Don McLean
Stairway to Heaven - Led Zeppelin
The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult
The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide is Press Coverage - Panic! at the Disco
Cable Car - The Fray
Only Love Can Break Your Heart - Neil Young
Bonito - Jarabe de Palo
Knights of the Round Table - Monty Python
Eye of the Tiger - Survivor
Imagine - John Lennon

My Mustache

A-my a-moostache is-a better than-a your moostache, because you a-don't have a moostache, you moostacheless fool! You are-a jealous of-a my moostache, because it is an impressive a-moostache, and your a-face is a-lacking a-moostache, a-you moostacheless fool.

(Music continues to play, I tap dance)

A-my moostache, is a-better than any a-moostache you have a-ever a-seen!!!!
Because my-a moostache,
is-a better than-a your moostache,
because-a you-a don't have a moostache,
a-you moostacheless,
foo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-l!!!!
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hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-blood-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-death-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-hugs-
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James Randi exposes James Hydrick Part 1

James Randi exposes James Hydrick Part 2

Psychology teacher told us about this when we learned about ESP. It is hilarious, "The styrofoam, and the lights form electricity which pulls the page, down."

Excuse me.

Okay, so yesterday, we had a pep rally. Yay. I hate pep rallies, they are so annoying, although I have to admit, the noise was much more bearable than last year. Last year, every was cramped against each other, so movement was impossible. This must have been quite a painful experience to some, because they would lean down, and scream in your ear, as loud as possible. Seriously, it would be so loud, that you would just hear one high-pitched whine throughout the entire gym, and yet someone next to you could still screech loud enough so that you could distinctly hear them. Well, the day was pretty messed up as far as the schedule went, we pretty much had 30 minutes classes in which we did nothing. Plus, yesterday was the last day of the grading quarter for report cards. This may seem to make no sense, but I got a 93 'A' in the hardest class ever, AP World History (interesting, though) while my lowest grade was an 88 'B', my only 'B', in Psychology, the easiest class... That is a real dissapointment. GAAHAHHAH HEJO#WM!!@!11!!1!.

Anyway, the reason I posted this is because of something that made me laugh uncontrollably at lunch, yesterday. My friend Anthony, as we were standing behind this massive crowd going into the gym (when it ended, we were in the bleachers farthest from the door, yet managed to be some of the first ones out) said that he had always wanted to just go through a line and nudge people out of the way, saying "Excuse me." Well, at lunch, he did just that. When we got into line he was like "See ya later" and then just walked by the side of the line (it was blocked in by a wall and a metal rail thing) and saying "Excuse me" to everyone. He even tapped on kid on the shoulder, who turned around and then moved whenever Anthony said "Excuse me." For some reason, this reminds me of this kid that we had to sit with at the end of the school year for lunch (we had eaten in the library since around the start of 2nd semester, and when they closed for the year, we had to go back to the cafeteria and find a seat). No one was sitting near him, so we sat down. He started talking about Wolfenstein, and when someone was leaving, he came over and put his tray (covered with trash) next to this kid. I said how that was rude, and asked him if they always did that: "Yeah. I usually just put it under the table." <- Which he did. Anthony and I laughed. After lunch, Anthony said to me that he didn't like that kid, that he looked like someone who played alot of First-Person Shooters, got picked on alot, and would come to school with a gun and kill everyone someday.

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But seriously, Pac-man is better than Call of Duty.

KGB Mockumentary and New Blog Name

Well, it has been much, much too long since my last post, but I have been piled with homework, and any time I have to spare I spend on Darker Realms, or (as of earlier this week) Pokemon Crystal Version. So, I will make it up with this very, very long post that will only matter to about 2 people. First, remember that mockumentary I said I would like to make? Well, I have started writing the script on it. Obviously, it is all about the Kent Grove Boys and their coo'ness. The script is going great, I am the only one who has written anything in it, but much of it was inspired from Anthony and Kris, so I have to give them credit. I am also going to run it through them (literally!) when I finish, and they will make any changes they see fit, although Kris's involvement is with one very specific, recurring part which, you will see if we ever get it done. I won't say anything about the script, because I don't want anyone to steal it (oh yes, they would), or worse, the KGB to come and shoot me down. But you will notice the very ridiculous, recurring part of which I speak. When you see it. Obviously, the cast will include myself, Anthony, Kris, and probably my brother. This does leave many spots though, I am not sure who we could get to fill them out, even though we will each play several parts. I'll figure that out after the script is done. When will the movie be released (probably on youtube)? I'd say definently within a year, although it depends how much each of us commit to the movie. One last thing I want to say about the movie, is how ironic it is that it is a mockumentary, since the worst movie ever made (in my humble opinion) was a mockumentary. I won't mention it here, but let's say that it premiered on Nickelodeon. And it is awful. Very, very horrendous.

So, now I move on. The name has changed! I realized if I left it as '1337 8106' long enough, someone would think that I really type in 1337, or even worse, that I was a poser! It was a joke, people! I was making fun of 1337 5p34k3r2, is all. I mean, I thought it was obvious, since everythin on this blog makes fun at stuff. Sheesh. Anyway, I changed it to 'Uhh...Because its theirs' because it was the first thing that I could remember. Let me explain. A few days ago, in AP World History, our teacher asked why Britain wouldn't just-- Sorry, Great Britain--give independence to one of their colonies in Africa (the colony wanted independence). Anthony raised his hand, so she called on him. He said "Okay, uhh...", he clearly didn't have an answer ready, despite having his hand up, so he must have decided to give the first reasonable answer that came into his head, "Because it's theirs." <-- That just might be the most obvious answer of all time, but it was indeed what the teacher had wanted.

Yep.

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Next post: Why Crystal Version is the best Pokemon game + list of 10/10 games (yeah, I know).

Flu

Well, I seem to have a flu. Not swine flu, but a flu. It came on pretty randomly, yesterday evening, and has lasted. Even at this moment, I have a 102.4F fever. This sucks, because I was supposed to go to my friend's house today. But noooo. *sigh*. Well, this flu has had some predictable effects that always happen to me when I have a fever. For 1: I was slightly hallucinating earlier. Actually, this only started with the last time I had a fever, when I thought there were pirates in the kitchen. This time, though, I thought I was King Arthur, and that a major battle had just happened in the living room, and my leg was cut, and some guy poured medicine on it. Perceval, Lancelot, and Guinevere were also present, and I felt a need to write a message to my brother to come to Camelot, on my wall. And 2: I had a mild feeling of a night terror, which didn't manage to escalate fully, where I was freaking out about how people say 'Hi' when they knock on the door, or something. Luckily, there was plenty of light around, and I eventually came out of it. Before it was able to become really, really scary, I mean. Because I always think of something stupid like that, then I start to think that I need to fix it somehow, even though there is absolutely nothing to fix, then I start to think of complex machines, and that is when it is the worst. Feeling possible, that is.

I won.

I have won a position on the 9th grade student council as representative. My strategy? I did absolutely nothing. No posters, no candy, no coupons for 10 free hot wings at Beef'o'Brady's. At most, I made sure my closest friends voted for me. And I won. Thanks.
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Are you saying I belong at Weenie Hut Jr.'s?

I got "told" today.

Today, as I was walking to the hospital to do volunteer work, I crossed over a bridge. Now apparently, middle school now gets out 50 minutes earlier than last year, because there were a bunch of kids no older than 12 while I was walking over the bridge. Now, as I walk, this kid riding a bike passes me, and this kid who is obsessed with being cool (you could tell by his hair, and the way he talked) said this, all to me:

"Hey, stop the small short kid on the bike." I didn't. "What the hell, good for nothing... Hey what is your name, asspile?" Yes, he called me an asspile. "What grade are you in? 9th?" I said nothing.

I am sure that after he and the other 12-year-olds passed me, he told them all "Yeah, you see that faggot wimp? I just told a 9th grader, I'm coo." He was black by the way, which I have no problem with, except that it is these kind of "asspiles" that make these stereotypes that all blacks want to be gangsters. And now it is spreading to white boys who think it is cooler than anything to speak with an accent often heard from gang members, like "Yo, hey man, wassup, 's coo', ya' 'so s'ol' ode ge..." because black kids like this make people think that all blacks talk like that, and for some reason teen boys think that being black is coo', which is as stupid as a Latino thinking that being Oriental is coo', and thus speak how they think blacks speak, when it is really just the "asspiles" like this.
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Asspile.

Magic 8-ball Program

Here is a very simple magic 8-ball program I made in Python (2.6.2). It has funny answers. Owned. And sorry about the screwed up indents, you will need to fix those yourself, I'm too lazy atm.
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import random

dice = ("Without a doubt",
"It is certain",
"Maybe",
"Yes",
"All signs point to 23",
"No",
"Erm...no",
"Try asking again",
"You should probably diffuse the bomb beneath your chair.",
"Confucious says 'No'",
"42")

while True:
choice = raw_input("Type 'ask' to ask a question. "
"Type 'info' for information. "
"Type 'quit' to quit.\n").lower()

if choice == "ask":
raw_input("Please enter your question:\n")
roll = random.randrange(0, len(dice))
print dice[roll]
elif choice == "info":
print ("To use the Magic 8-Ball, type 'ask' (without the quotes) at the"
"\nmain prompt. You will then be asked to enter your question,"
"\nafter which you will receive the answer from the ball."
"\n\n Created by The Supreme Dark Overlo-- Joseph.")
elif choice == "quit":
break
else:
print "Error -- Try again\n"

raw_input()
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-->Slayer<-- (Desk) idles.

Top movies list

I'll be changing this frequently, but for now, my top 20 favorite movies are:

1. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
2. 12 Angry Men
3. The Shining
4. Life of Brian
5. Gone With the Wind
6. Schindler's List
7. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
8. The Matrix
9. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
10. Forrest Gump
11. Singin' in the Rain
12. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
13. Pirates of the Carribean: Curse of the Black Pearl
14. The Shawshank Redemption
15. The Bridge on the River Kwai
16. It's a Wonderful Life
17. The Green Mile
18. Star Wars Episode V
19. The Silence of the Lambs
20. The Usual Suspects

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Nee.

Stupidest Thing I've Ever Done...

Today in Psychology, we needed to write about the stupidest thing we have ever done. Mine:

"Recently, I thought it would be a good idea to take on the Cave Dragon with my level 10 mage. I died."

The teacher read some random responses, and mine was the second to last. He read it like this:

"I tried to take on the Cave Dragon with my level 10 m...mage? I died."

My friend and I nearly -died- of laughter. Then some random kid said:

"What an idiot move! Every knows that you can't take on the Cave Dragon with your level 10 mage!"

He was just being a smart-ass, but it was hilarious.

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Darker Realms

Today in Psychology, we got a great assignment: Whenever we laugh, write down what we laughed at and why it was funny. My friend who doesn't have Psychology perverted this fact by making me laugh when we were having an argument. He would randomly say something funny, and I'd laugh....."CRAP! Now I have to record that laugh. Thanks a lot."

He is the one with the desk that says "SLAYER" by the way.
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Anyway, topic of the day. Let's see....

I dunno. Psychology again:

You surf the TV where you find a program about an 80-year old woman giving vulgar sexual advice to young callers. Why is this situation funny?

Was something else we went over in Psychology.
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You have 2,589 experience points, 213 gold coins,
74/74 hit points, 74/74 spell points, and 7/450 quest points.
You are Tiresias the medium beginner (evil) (level 4).
You are sober.
You will wimpy out of a fight at 20% of maximum hit points.
age: 3 hours 40 minutes 32 seconds.

I dunno.

Skit Number One

Skit Numero Uno. What, skits?? Well, this is something I threw together based loosely on something that happened to my friend last year. I only post this now because I completely forgot about my blog until now, and am using this as a backup. Enjoy.
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Purple:

--Library--

Tall white kid with blond hair walks in, wearing a purple jacket

Kid: Hi everyone, I am here! *Flips hair* *smiles*

group of 6th grade girls sitting at table look at kid, then look at each other and giggle
girl 1:Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, it's him!!
girl 2:I know!

Kid walks behind check out counter.
Kid: [to library helper] You aren't supposed to be back here
Helper: I help out here every Friday
Kid: Oh. *flips hair* Tha's coo' *punches kid on shoulder*
Helper leans back, looking at Kid strangely.
Librarian arrives from room behind counter
Librarian: [to Kid] You aren't supposed to be here.
Kid: Of course I am, I work here every Friday, I started 6 months ago, remember?
Librarian: No.
Kid flips his hair
Librarain: Oh, now I remember.
Helper: He has never worked here before.
Librarian ignores Helper
Librarian: [to Kid] Why don't you do check-out?
Helper: I'M doing check-out
Kid: It is okay, you don't have to feel bad about it. I'm sure Mr...uh
Librarian: Just call me Rob
Kid: *smiles* *flips hair*I'm sure Rob just prefers more experienced helpers to check-out,
It is nothing to worry about, when you've worked here as long as I have, you'll be
allowed to run check-out smoothly too.
Helper: But you've nev--
Librarian: STOP WHINING LIKE A SCUMBAG AND GO SHELF BOOKS!!!
Tears well up in Helper's eyes. Helper runs away trying not to cry.
Kid: Rob, I'm sorry, but I think I would prefer the peace and quiet of my house today, if you
understand.
Librarian: Completely. *Sits at check-out*
Kid: By the way, I've been remixing my song:

Sings a song

Kid begins to leave. When he gets to Library door, he turns around.

Kid: (loudly) Well, everyone, it is time for me to leave. Good bye! *flips hair* *leaves*


The girls watch Kid leave, then turn around and giggle.
Girl 3: I know hot, and I know -->HAWT<--, and THAT *looks at doors* is -->HAWT<--
Girl 1: Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh, should I ask him out???@@#@??
Girl 3: I'll ask him for you!
Girl 3 jumps up, runs to Library doors, leans out and yells "WILL YOU GO OUT WITH JULIE!!??"
Girl 3 walks back to table
Girl 1: What did he say, what he say??
Girl 3: He just smiled and kept walking..
Girl 1: What does it mean? Should I ask him out myself?
Girl 4: Yeth, you thould totally athk him out, he ith a thtuuuuuu....*has seizure*

THE END

KGB -- Kent Grove Boys

Down here in semi-rural Florida, there is a street. On this street, there are houses/mobile homes. In these homes, there are redneck families. In these families, there are children. And in the minds of these children, there is one thing they all seem to aspire to be: a Kent Grove Boy. Ya, the hood on Kent Grove St. and surrounding areas in Pasco are under control of the KGB. Their turf, proven by tags, extends for miles.

So you think your coo enough to join? Well, there are several requirements. My brother, he knew this kid on our bus. This kid has a brother who is in the KGB. His initiation? To jump on the back of a moving train, to prove he is "tuf", or something. My brother aspired to be a Kent Grove Boy ever since.
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This is probably the thing I find most consistently funny in my mind. This is really how people think of the single "gang" in our area. "Hey, you see that tag? KGB, ya!" It is beyond retarded. I have always imagined that it would make a hilarious "documentary" to drive down Kent Grove Street, and say how all the opposing gangs in the area are scared to death of them, and that it is a major crack center. Of course, gangsta rap music would be persistent in the background.

This would probably make all the simpletons who think that being gangsta (sometimes referred to as "White on the outside, Black on the inside" here, since there are few blacks here. This phrase always struck me as idiotic and racist) is the most significant thing a person could do. Especially when they hear that crack is sold there. Of course it isn't. The worse illegal things there are underage tobacco smoking and possibly small amounts of pot. But, then anybody with half a brain would understand the joke, which proves that the KGB, collectively, have less than one whole brain.
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Kay-Gee-BuEE!

IMPORTANT: Word spelling change

If you didn't a'ready know:

The o' spe'ing of the word "coo" (c-o-o-l) is now discontinued. The 'l' wasn't coo enough for a' the homeboys, so they dropped it. For all you 6th graders out there (7th graders in some states), make sure your vocabuary is sty'ing, because you is in Middle Schoo now, and being coo is everything.

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Obviously, this is a joke, but it points out something very important: Ebonics are aweosome.
Especially to new kids in Middle School who think along the lines of "OMG I'm in middle school now, gotta be gangsta/emo/goth/punk/cool"(until they find out about the new spelling)" gotta get a bf/gf/bf and gf, gotta pick on nerds, gotta get a cell phone, go to the mall, listen to music with nosensical lyrics...." and so on, forever.

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Wake Up Crew's Ebonics Language Lesson.
Ava'able in da hood near you.

First Post: -->Slayer<-- (Desk) and hidden messages

Welcome to my 1337 8106 (leet blog, because leetness is essential). I don't know what a blog is supposed to be, so I will just post random stuff.

There will be two things you need to know to fully appreciate this blog though:

1. At my school, in the most boring class of the day, Spanish, I sit next to my friend. When we
chose desks, he sat at one with the word "SLAYER" carved into the bottom of the surface.
Hence my chosen name, -->Slayer<--. (The --> <-- adds coo'ness.)

2. "The Masons built clues into everything." There will be plenty of "hidden meanings", "clues",
and "secret messages" in my blog. Check out the URL for the first one.

Enjoy.

PS -- I am not a Mason. Apparently National Treasure 2 is infallible as far as "clues" go.