Flu

Well, I seem to have a flu. Not swine flu, but a flu. It came on pretty randomly, yesterday evening, and has lasted. Even at this moment, I have a 102.4F fever. This sucks, because I was supposed to go to my friend's house today. But noooo. *sigh*. Well, this flu has had some predictable effects that always happen to me when I have a fever. For 1: I was slightly hallucinating earlier. Actually, this only started with the last time I had a fever, when I thought there were pirates in the kitchen. This time, though, I thought I was King Arthur, and that a major battle had just happened in the living room, and my leg was cut, and some guy poured medicine on it. Perceval, Lancelot, and Guinevere were also present, and I felt a need to write a message to my brother to come to Camelot, on my wall. And 2: I had a mild feeling of a night terror, which didn't manage to escalate fully, where I was freaking out about how people say 'Hi' when they knock on the door, or something. Luckily, there was plenty of light around, and I eventually came out of it. Before it was able to become really, really scary, I mean. Because I always think of something stupid like that, then I start to think that I need to fix it somehow, even though there is absolutely nothing to fix, then I start to think of complex machines, and that is when it is the worst. Feeling possible, that is.

I won.

I have won a position on the 9th grade student council as representative. My strategy? I did absolutely nothing. No posters, no candy, no coupons for 10 free hot wings at Beef'o'Brady's. At most, I made sure my closest friends voted for me. And I won. Thanks.
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Are you saying I belong at Weenie Hut Jr.'s?

I got "told" today.

Today, as I was walking to the hospital to do volunteer work, I crossed over a bridge. Now apparently, middle school now gets out 50 minutes earlier than last year, because there were a bunch of kids no older than 12 while I was walking over the bridge. Now, as I walk, this kid riding a bike passes me, and this kid who is obsessed with being cool (you could tell by his hair, and the way he talked) said this, all to me:

"Hey, stop the small short kid on the bike." I didn't. "What the hell, good for nothing... Hey what is your name, asspile?" Yes, he called me an asspile. "What grade are you in? 9th?" I said nothing.

I am sure that after he and the other 12-year-olds passed me, he told them all "Yeah, you see that faggot wimp? I just told a 9th grader, I'm coo." He was black by the way, which I have no problem with, except that it is these kind of "asspiles" that make these stereotypes that all blacks want to be gangsters. And now it is spreading to white boys who think it is cooler than anything to speak with an accent often heard from gang members, like "Yo, hey man, wassup, 's coo', ya' 'so s'ol' ode ge..." because black kids like this make people think that all blacks talk like that, and for some reason teen boys think that being black is coo', which is as stupid as a Latino thinking that being Oriental is coo', and thus speak how they think blacks speak, when it is really just the "asspiles" like this.
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Asspile.

Magic 8-ball Program

Here is a very simple magic 8-ball program I made in Python (2.6.2). It has funny answers. Owned. And sorry about the screwed up indents, you will need to fix those yourself, I'm too lazy atm.
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import random

dice = ("Without a doubt",
"It is certain",
"Maybe",
"Yes",
"All signs point to 23",
"No",
"Erm...no",
"Try asking again",
"You should probably diffuse the bomb beneath your chair.",
"Confucious says 'No'",
"42")

while True:
choice = raw_input("Type 'ask' to ask a question. "
"Type 'info' for information. "
"Type 'quit' to quit.\n").lower()

if choice == "ask":
raw_input("Please enter your question:\n")
roll = random.randrange(0, len(dice))
print dice[roll]
elif choice == "info":
print ("To use the Magic 8-Ball, type 'ask' (without the quotes) at the"
"\nmain prompt. You will then be asked to enter your question,"
"\nafter which you will receive the answer from the ball."
"\n\n Created by The Supreme Dark Overlo-- Joseph.")
elif choice == "quit":
break
else:
print "Error -- Try again\n"

raw_input()
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-->Slayer<-- (Desk) idles.

Top movies list

I'll be changing this frequently, but for now, my top 20 favorite movies are:

1. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
2. 12 Angry Men
3. The Shining
4. Life of Brian
5. Gone With the Wind
6. Schindler's List
7. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
8. The Matrix
9. Monty Python and the Holy Grail
10. Forrest Gump
11. Singin' in the Rain
12. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
13. Pirates of the Carribean: Curse of the Black Pearl
14. The Shawshank Redemption
15. The Bridge on the River Kwai
16. It's a Wonderful Life
17. The Green Mile
18. Star Wars Episode V
19. The Silence of the Lambs
20. The Usual Suspects

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Nee.

Stupidest Thing I've Ever Done...

Today in Psychology, we needed to write about the stupidest thing we have ever done. Mine:

"Recently, I thought it would be a good idea to take on the Cave Dragon with my level 10 mage. I died."

The teacher read some random responses, and mine was the second to last. He read it like this:

"I tried to take on the Cave Dragon with my level 10 m...mage? I died."

My friend and I nearly -died- of laughter. Then some random kid said:

"What an idiot move! Every knows that you can't take on the Cave Dragon with your level 10 mage!"

He was just being a smart-ass, but it was hilarious.

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Darker Realms

Today in Psychology, we got a great assignment: Whenever we laugh, write down what we laughed at and why it was funny. My friend who doesn't have Psychology perverted this fact by making me laugh when we were having an argument. He would randomly say something funny, and I'd laugh....."CRAP! Now I have to record that laugh. Thanks a lot."

He is the one with the desk that says "SLAYER" by the way.
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Anyway, topic of the day. Let's see....

I dunno. Psychology again:

You surf the TV where you find a program about an 80-year old woman giving vulgar sexual advice to young callers. Why is this situation funny?

Was something else we went over in Psychology.
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You have 2,589 experience points, 213 gold coins,
74/74 hit points, 74/74 spell points, and 7/450 quest points.
You are Tiresias the medium beginner (evil) (level 4).
You are sober.
You will wimpy out of a fight at 20% of maximum hit points.
age: 3 hours 40 minutes 32 seconds.

I dunno.

Skit Number One

Skit Numero Uno. What, skits?? Well, this is something I threw together based loosely on something that happened to my friend last year. I only post this now because I completely forgot about my blog until now, and am using this as a backup. Enjoy.
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Purple:

--Library--

Tall white kid with blond hair walks in, wearing a purple jacket

Kid: Hi everyone, I am here! *Flips hair* *smiles*

group of 6th grade girls sitting at table look at kid, then look at each other and giggle
girl 1:Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, it's him!!
girl 2:I know!

Kid walks behind check out counter.
Kid: [to library helper] You aren't supposed to be back here
Helper: I help out here every Friday
Kid: Oh. *flips hair* Tha's coo' *punches kid on shoulder*
Helper leans back, looking at Kid strangely.
Librarian arrives from room behind counter
Librarian: [to Kid] You aren't supposed to be here.
Kid: Of course I am, I work here every Friday, I started 6 months ago, remember?
Librarian: No.
Kid flips his hair
Librarain: Oh, now I remember.
Helper: He has never worked here before.
Librarian ignores Helper
Librarian: [to Kid] Why don't you do check-out?
Helper: I'M doing check-out
Kid: It is okay, you don't have to feel bad about it. I'm sure Mr...uh
Librarian: Just call me Rob
Kid: *smiles* *flips hair*I'm sure Rob just prefers more experienced helpers to check-out,
It is nothing to worry about, when you've worked here as long as I have, you'll be
allowed to run check-out smoothly too.
Helper: But you've nev--
Librarian: STOP WHINING LIKE A SCUMBAG AND GO SHELF BOOKS!!!
Tears well up in Helper's eyes. Helper runs away trying not to cry.
Kid: Rob, I'm sorry, but I think I would prefer the peace and quiet of my house today, if you
understand.
Librarian: Completely. *Sits at check-out*
Kid: By the way, I've been remixing my song:

Sings a song

Kid begins to leave. When he gets to Library door, he turns around.

Kid: (loudly) Well, everyone, it is time for me to leave. Good bye! *flips hair* *leaves*


The girls watch Kid leave, then turn around and giggle.
Girl 3: I know hot, and I know -->HAWT<--, and THAT *looks at doors* is -->HAWT<--
Girl 1: Oh my gosh, Oh my gosh, should I ask him out???@@#@??
Girl 3: I'll ask him for you!
Girl 3 jumps up, runs to Library doors, leans out and yells "WILL YOU GO OUT WITH JULIE!!??"
Girl 3 walks back to table
Girl 1: What did he say, what he say??
Girl 3: He just smiled and kept walking..
Girl 1: What does it mean? Should I ask him out myself?
Girl 4: Yeth, you thould totally athk him out, he ith a thtuuuuuu....*has seizure*

THE END